Classes for Kids That Would Actually be Useful!

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I am blessed to live in a fairly decent school district.  While Georgia is not generally known for it’s quality education, we managed to get into a decent school district and my kids were placed into the gifted program in first grade.  As a result, they have had an assortment of  high level math classes, great opportunities for scientific research, and some fairly outside the box thinking.  I’m lucky that their school offers classes for kids that really challenge them intellectually.  Now that they are teens I am totally incapable of helping them with their homework.  If you ever want to feel completely ignorant, just try helping a 14 year old with his trigonometry homework. Despite the amazing opportunities my kids have taken part in, I can’t help thinking that there are a number of important things that my children remain ignorant of.  These high level classes for kids are challenging them intellectually but not providing much in the way of useful life information.  I mean, honestly, when is the last time you had to use trigonometry in your daily life?  I decided my kids need a few basic, remedial classes to help them integrate into society, become independent and not embarrass themselves in social situations.  Here are just a few real life classes for kids that I need to enroll my children in:

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Classes for Kids That would Actually Be Useful

Classes for Kids That Would Actually be Useful

How to Not Embarrass Yourself at the Dinner Table: Topics include inexcusable bodily functions, proper posture,  which utensil to use for each course, and how NOT to insult the cook with gagging noises and rude comments. If time allows, we will also cover which topics to NOT discuss at the dinner table.  Most of which involve bodily functions or anything you overheard in the locker room.

Dishwasher loading 101:  Forget advanced geometry and learn how to properly fit plates and bowls into their correct slots in the dishwasher.  Complicated analysis of dishwasher layout will be followed with practice drills to see who can load the most dirty dishes into the dishwasher without breaking anything.

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Hangers: An in depth analysis: The proper usage of hangers is a seriously undervalued skill.  Learn how to properly hang pants, shirts, and accessories on these useful gadgets to prevent excessive laundry creation.  At the end of the course you will have to prove competency by keeping your closet floor free of clothing for an entire week.

The Joy of Garbage:  Learn how taking out the garbage without being asked can bring joy to the life of you and your parents.  Class will include proper garbage bag closure and what to do in case of leakage.  Fee required to pay for garbage bags.

The Basics of Human Interaction:  In today’s digital world there is more time spent taking selfies and instagraming your lunch than actually talking to real people.  To complete this course, student must be able to walk to their friends house, knock on the door and convince them to come outside without any assistance from an electronic device.

 

These are just a few of the useful skills I think my kids are lacking in, despite being able to recite the Greek alphabet and solve complicated algebraic formulas.  Yes, these are things they should be learning here at home.  And trust me, I have tried teaching them these much needed skills for years with little success. Hours of instruction on hanger usage and dishwasher loading have seemingly been completely ignored.  It’s like I am speaking a totally foreign language some days. Maybe I need a class on how to speak teenager?

 

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Comments

  1. Yes!! I think schools should offer life skills classes but honestly that is the parents responsibility. I think I need laundry 101 sometimes too! lol
    • I am going to force my kids to start doing laundry very soon. I think they would learn very quickly that things they THINK are dirty, really aren't!
  2. Luckily most of these are super pet peeves of mine so they are taught here at home, very early. It would be nice though if more kids were taught these all to important lessons..if for anything a little sanity for parents nationwide!
    • I am working on kid training here too...but there seems to be a distinct lack of comprehension on their part!
  3. Can I sign my husband up for the dishwashing 101 class? The way he loads this dishwasher is miserable at best. How he expects bowls to get clean is beyond me!
  4. As cute as this post was, there is a lot of reality in there. It would be great for our kids to learn this things as it makes them a better adult who is more prepared to handle being a grown up!
    • I sometimes cringe when I think that my children are one day going to be unleashed on the world. Despite repeated attempts, my kids just cant seem to grasp some vital life skill!
  5. MyKidsGuide says
    Love these classes! I think I need the hangar one, lol! I always find clothes on the floor in my closet!
  6. How about Choking 101: How Not To Block Your Throat or Truth 101: Not Lying About Things I Will Discover Anyway

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