Sex Humor:  How SPAM can improve your sex life

Sex Humor: How SPAM can improve your sex life

I receive large amounts of SPAM emails on a daily basis.  There are about a million people telling me I have won various international lotteries or close friends who have suddenly become stranded in foreign countries and need money.  Apparently many, many individuals feel that I need to improve my sex life with Viagra…despite the fact that I don’t have the right parts for that to be an effective therapy.  Most of it just gets filtered out of my inbox and into my SPAM folder but a few of them make it through and are titled creatively enough to make me actually open them.

Last week, I received an interesting notice regarding the places people most often enjoy having sex and I admit…I was curious.  I mean, how many places can a person actually HAVE sex without getting arrested or psychologically scarring small children?  You might be surprised…

A Little Sex Humor

America’s favorite place to have sex just happens to be:

In the shower (25%)

At the beach (18%)

The local college library (14%)

An airplane (10%)

A public park (9%)

The backseat of a car (9%)

A swimming pool (9%)

Their parents’ bedroom (6%)

 

Since that adds up to 100%, where are the people who think having sex in their own beds is exciting enough?  Because I was bored (and decided I needed to see what Google thought of these results) I did a little further investigating into this matter. Here are just a few of the odd results:

1. A Dutch couple was arrested for having sex on a police car…one that actually had police officers still in it.

2. In 1916, the first ever known case of sex on a plane resulted in a plane crash ….because it was the pilot who was actually  having sex.

3. A Florida couple climbed up on a crane in broad daylight to have sex….yes, they were caught in the act.  Apparently, a naked foot was spotted sticking out of the railing and the concerned members of the public called the  police.

4.  A couple in Cesena, Italy were caught in a very delicate situation in the confessional booth during morning mass.  Apparently the noise was interfering with the sermon.

5.  A couple was spotted by beach goers struggling, fighting for their lives and almost drowning in the ocean. However, after a rescue helicopter was dispatched along with a lifeboat and police officers, it turns out that the couple wasn’t drowning, but  having sex.

 

Well, clearly, my sex life is nowhere near exciting enough if it doesn’t involve rescue helicopters or positions that may very well result in falling to my death! I’m not sure if I’m willing to be the gossip of the neighborhood by getting arrested for public indecency so I don’t see any intimate moments on top of police cars in my near future.

Have you ever indulged in a little bit of public indecency?

 

 

Diane Signature
About Diane

Diane is a professional blogger and nationally certified pharmacy technician with two teens, one husband and more pets than she will admit to. She has a bachelor’s degree in Microbiology but left her career in science to become a stay at home mom. Years of playing with Legos and coloring with crayons had her craving a more grown up purpose to her life and she began blogging full time. She currently deals with emotional tweens, suburban politics, and middle aged metabolism while sharing her opinions in an honest and down to earth fashion on her blog.

Comments

  1. I have to say that just getting our bed to ourselves to have the opportunity is good enough for me these days… or at least all the kids asleep at the same time

  2. ugh, i had neighbors like that once…i will never forget that! LOL

  3. I love this post. I get those emails too. I want to send them a response and say, “You are sending these to someone named Pam. Hello, they won’t work!”

  4. Those spam emails are a pain. I’ve finally got my spam buster to just delete them now without seeing them. funny post

  5. This was pretty funny. I love odd humor. Though when the SPAM emails even look close to this crazy I hit delete.

Speak Your Mind

*